I’ve a reputation for the forgotten, forgettable, off-brand, off-axis video games of our youth. I name them: Cousin Video games.
The easiest way to get within the Cousin Sport mindset is to think about being dropped off in a home that smells completely different from the way you assume a home is meant to odor and also you go right into a room with a man who’s like a bizarre model of you, and he’s enjoying Nintendo — which you perceive — however while you have a look at the display, it’s like… What’s that?… What the hell is that?
A Cousin Sport is a recreation you don’t personal, and don’t essentially wish to personal. However “Cousin Sport” shouldn’t be a euphemism for “unhealthy recreation.” There are many unhealthy video games that aren’t cousin video games.
Right here’s a fast record of Cousin Video games:
Cousin Video games aren’t “normie” video games. Madden shouldn’t be a Cousin Sport. It’s only a recreation your cousin performs. That is true for many sports activities video games, however not at all times true in excessive sports activities and motorsport.
Tony Hawk’s Professional Skater shouldn’t be a Cousin Sport, however Tony Hawk’s Underground 2 is. AirBlade is a Cousin Sport.
A recreation with Spider-Man in it has a 75 % likelihood of being a Cousin Sport. Eighty % for Wolverine. Ninety % for Taz.
Generally, licensed tie-in video games have a better likelihood of being Cousin Video games.
First and third-party mascot video games are not often Cousin Video games, however there are lots of exceptions within the Sonic franchise. First-party Nintendo video games are by no means Cousin Video games. Apart from Geist, which is unquestionably a Cousin Sport.
PC video games will be Cousin Video games, however are much more more likely to be Uncle Video games, which we don’t have time to get into.
The Cousin Sport is outlined by a thriller. How did this recreation come to be on this wrong-smelling home? Was it a present from a mother or father, plucked arbitrarily from a Babbage’s shelf? Or did your cousin imagine in BattleTanx 2? Do they nonetheless consider it fondly at present? Is it as candy and acquainted of their reminiscence as it’s unusual in yours?
And in the event you see any of the video games talked about right here and stated, “that’s not a Cousin Sport,” you could have to think about the troubling chance that you are the cousin. Assist is offered.